Empowering Ability Podcast

#069: Stop telling, start listening.

Do you find yourself continually prompting your loved one to take care of their responsibilities around the house?!

It gets exhausting.

I’ve got a different approach for you to try this week…

To start, take a moment to mindfully slow down and breathe and listen to the different ways that your family member is communicating…

 

Check out this episode to learn more!

 

very best,

Eric

 

#068: safety vs. independence

How do you keep your loved one with a developmental disability safe while enabling them to develop their independence?

There is tension between safety and independence that we experience as families.

If you want to learn how you can stop overprotecting your loved one and limiting their life experiences I share more in this podcast.

Very best,

Eric

 

P.S. If you want to get your FREE copy of the Ultimate Guide to Independence go here: https://www.empoweringability.org/independence

#067: Achieving your goals in 2022

Happy 2022!

This year, I want to help you to live into the "Awesome Ordinary" life goals that you've got in your mind for your loved one and family.

Over the holidays, I read Will Smith's book titled "Will." So it was entertaining, yet profoundly deep and inspirational; I highly recommend it. In the book, Will Smith shares a great story about a Buddhist parable that teaches us that what got us to where we are today isn't going to get us to where we want to go.

I've got a short video/ article that shares the parable and how we can use this wisdom to help you achieve your goals in 2022.

 

very best,

Eric

 

P.S. If you want to get your FREE copy of the Ultimate Guide to Independence go here: https://www.empoweringability.org/independence

#066: Jamie just moved into his home

Charlotte wanted to support her son, Jamie, to move out into his own home but wasn’t sure how. I had the pleasure of working with Charlotte and Jamie to build an “Awesome Ordinary” life vision in my coaching programs. And recently, Jamie moved into his own home! I had the opportunity to catch up with Charlotte to learn about Jamie’s progress and how they did it!

 

CLICK HERE to join the waitlist for the Life Plan Coaching Program.

I’d love it if you left a kind comment below!

#065: My #1 strategy to motivate your loved one

Are you tired of prompting or telling your loved one to do things, maybe do things around the house?
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This is something that many families that I work with keep bumping into, and it becomes exhausting for you and frustrating for your loved one.
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In this video/article, I give you my #1 strategy to motivate your loved one! This means less prompting from you, and more choice and control for your loved one.

 

very best,

Eric Goll

P.S. If you want to get your FREE copy of the Ultimate Guide to Independence go here: https://www.empoweringability.org/independence

 

#064: Why focus on independence?

What do we mean by wanting our loved one with a developmental disability to have more independence?

And, why is helping your loved one grow their independence so important?

In this week's podcast, I tackle these questions and share the story of Sarah's journey to independence. Click the link below for the video and written transcription.

 

https://www.empoweringability.org/why-independence/

 

#63: We all fall down

Sometimes we fail, we fall down... and we get back up, dust ourselves off, and try again. Falling down is a significant way to learn and find meaning in our lives. So why don't you let your loved one with a developmental disability fall down? FEAR! Your loved one might have vulnerabilities, and you do your best to protect them from harm's way. BUT, the protection you provide might be leading to more harm than the natural consequences that you're saving your loved one from experiencing. In this video, you'll learn the value of allowing your loved one with a disability to fall down and experience the natural consequences.

#062: Joe Clayton’s Story Institutionalization and Building His Life Afterward

I'm honored to bring you this conversation I recorded with Joe Clayton. Joe is a survivor of Rideau Regional Center; an institution closed in Smith Falls, Ontario.

"We as the people, disabilities, we cry just like everybody else. We laugh like everybody else. We are human beings, just like everybody else. And like I said before, we just want the world to know we are not monsters who got out of institutions. We are human beings, and we need to be respected and to be loved. And we don't need to be treated like babies. We need to be treated like a human being and we... Yeah, that's it." - Joe Clayton

While being institutionalized as a child, Joe experienced several traumas and injustices and traumatic experiences which he shares with us in this podcast episode. Joe also shares his life after being institutionalized, and through his faith, he found forgiveness and the courage to live life. Joe is an indigenous man and a creative who expresses his creativity through photography and art. Joe now lives with his partner, Christina. Before you listen to this conversation with Joe, I want to warn you that Joe describes many of the horrific acts performed and forced on him. The description of these acts might be triggering for some listeners. Note: There is a full transcription of this podcast at the bottom of this post.

This conversation with Joe was recorded on April 16, 2020, and the time of this publication is September 1, 2020. A lot has changed in our world since I recorded this conversation with Joe Clayton. COVID-19 and its global impacts have been a significant stressor on our families, including mine. As well, there's been an awakening to the social justice issues in our world for black people, indigenous people, and people of color. So at the beginning of this episode, I share my stance and Empowering Ability's stance on antiracism, and what I'm doing to be an active antiracist. CLICK HERE for to read Empowering Ability's Antiracism commitment on our homepage.

Check out Joe Claytons Art and Photography on Facebook

Contact Joe Clayton: williamjc53@gmail.com

Below are some examples of Joe Clayton's Artwork and Photography

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Podcast transcription below was completed by Otter.ai. Please note that this transcription was completed word by word in the conversation and hasn't been corrected for written grammar.

Eric Goll 00:22

Hi, I'm Eric Goll and today I'm honored to bring you a conversation I recorded with Joe Clayton and Joe is a survivor of Rideau Regional Center, an institution that closed located in Smith Falls, Ontario. And this conversation with Joe was recorded on April 16 2020. Today being September 1 2020, at the time of this publication, and a lot has changed in our world since I publish or since I recorded rather this conversation with Joe Clayton. COVID-19 and its global impacts have been a major stressor stressor on our families, including mine. as well. There's been an awakening to the social justice issues in our world for black people, indigenous people and people of color. So before I share this conversation with Joe Clayton with you, I'm going to share my stance and Empowering Ability's stance on antiracism, and what I'm doing to be antiracis. We are committed to the work of anti racism. We are learning about anti-black racism, anti-indigenous racism, and how white privilege and superiority impact the people and communities we serve and that I serve. I am aware of the intersection of disability, LGBT LGBTQ plus and how that increases the societal devaluation of bipoc. We must continue to have uncomfortable conversations to dismantle systematic racial barriers that have blocked social and economic progress for black and indigenous peoples for generations as well as people with disabilities. We know that the first step towards change is to speak up. And we want to be very clear, Black Lives Matter to Empowering Ability, and we commit to no longer being silent or neutral as we move towards tangible action and change. So for me as the founder of Empowering Ability, I've completed a six week antiracism training course and I commit to ongoing learning on anti racism. As a sis gender white man, I'm doing the work to recognize my biases, you know, such as, I just want to share a few of these realizations that I've had with you around You know, my privilege and as a white cisgendered man. I'm not worried or I don't have the fear of being shot or killed when being pulled over in my car, by the police, or even, you know, being harassed for that matter. I can see my race and gender widely represented in roles and in spaces that I aspire to be in or I aspire to. I'm confident that I can reach out to organizations and to leaders and have them open my emails, or even share my content. I can be confident that families will be open to working with me because I feel familiar or I feel safe to them. I can speak to you without my race being put on trial. I can step away from the conversations of race if I wish to. So these are some examples that I've realized of my white privilege. And now, you know, I'm very aware of these things. Whereas six months ago, I wasn't. So, you know, part of this learning was through completed through a six week anti racism course, and I'm continuing my learning and my journey to be an anti racist. And I'm listening, and I'm listening to diverse voices. And I encourage all of us to be doing this work of anti racism. So thank you for listening to me on this important issue. And today I'm bringing you this conversation with Joe Clayton. Joe is a survivor of the region rideau regional center an institution in Smith Falls, Ontario. That has closed and Joe experienced several traumas and injustices at a very young age, while being institutionalized, and Joe shares with us his experiences, and he also shares, you know his life after being institutionalized, and through his faith, faith, how he found forgiveness, and the courage to live life. Joe is an indigenous man, he is a creative. And he expresses that through photography and art, and he lives with his partner, Christina. So, before we roll this conversation with Joe, I just want to warn you that Joe describes many of the horrific acts performed and forced on him. And the description of these acts might be triggering for some listeners. So here is my conversation with Joe Clayton. Joe, welcome to the Empowering Ability podcast. So happy to have you on today.

Joe Clayton 06:04 Oh, thank you.

Eric Goll 06:05

Yeah, right on. Well, it's a pleasure to have you and Joe Clayton as a self advocate and a survivor of an institution, the Rideau regional center. I am honored to have you come on the podcast today and share your story and to share your experience with us. So I'm going to hand it over to you here, Joe. And, and we would be honored to hear your story.

Joe Clayton 06:39
I want to say thank you to everybody who's listening to my story. And anyways, here we go. I was born in Pembroke, Ontario on February 9. I was eight pounds nine ounces. I was with my mom for five years. My mom was sick and she could not care for me. So my mum's friend looked up to me after me until she died. On August 18 1958, at the age of five I went to the Childrens Aid Society. I remember that day as if it were yesterday. My mom say goodbye to me. And I got into the car and stood up on the backseat of the car watching out the back window. As mom got smaller and smaller, and then she was gone in my life. My life was like a game I'm I was always made to move one place to another, someone from the journey so they would throw my clothes in the trunk of the car, and they would take me to a new place. Upon arrival at the new place, I was told you have to stay here. I had no say in the matter. I felt like people were rejecting me all the time, and that no one really cared for me. Nobody seemed to understand my needs or my problems. And they never asked me to talk about them. My foster mom decided it would be better if I was institutionalized before I came too close or too dependent on my foster family on May 16 1966, at the age of 12, the journeys I put me in to Rideau Regional Center at Smith falls. Let me tell you, being an institution was like living in hell. First of all, I was put in the mission ward where we were made, where we made us to take our clothes off and stand before them naked. The staff didn't proceed to measure us to determine what size of clothes we need until our clothes arrive. About a week later, we had nothing else to wear as a nightgown. Once our clothes arrived, we had to put our names on every item to make sure no one stole them from us. During this day of the mission ward this staffs would take us for walks. And we were made two hands so that nobody would run away. This made me feel like a dog. The staff also line up like a herd of sheep. After two weeks in the mission Ward, I was transferred to tree D Ward, resident with 25 male patients remember that I was only 12 years old at the time. I can't tell you how afraid I was looking up at these older men who look like giants to me. We had to stand in line for our meals and for our pills, which they call candies. If I move a inch while In this line, one of the patients would attacked me. Needless to say, I only moved once in the lineup, and never again. We also had to walk down the hallway in line to get your shirts with our towels wrapped around our waist. We have to shower in the same place with no privacy, which made me feel like I was in prison. I was terrified and scared seeing all these naked men around me. They hit me with wet roll up towels, and I end up cuts on my body. I was also gang raped in the shower and pass out from this attack. There were there was lots of fighting and stealing in 3d. I fear for my life and my belongings. And older men attacked me with scissors. I was cut but nobody cared how I was treated. I was made to feel ashamed very lonely and afraid for my life. The doors to 3d were always locked and the only time I was allowed other staff members to go walks washroom, showers, meals or school. Once when I did not follow the rule is I was put in a dark room. They call this the side room where doors were a locked. I was made to sit naked on a cold floor. And when I was sitting on the cold floor, there is no toilets, there was no bathroom. So you would just bathroom on the floor, and then you when you leave the side room, you come back and you clean it. men would look in the windows and laugh at me. Another time when I did not follow the rules. They put my head in a toilet bowl and maybe kneel in a corner for two to three hours. Once when I swear they made me eat a bar of soap. I was sick to my stomach. There was never any privacy at Rideau. I did not understand why I was being treated so badly. I sat in the corner crying of fear and sadness. Not all the staffs are bad people, we had some good staffs as well. Every night I was attacked and raped by some of the patients who said, If I told the staff they would kill me, this went on for six years, and I was once told I would. I was being taken for a brain test, where they hook wires up to my head and put a piece of wood under my tongue. I was then shock. And my entire jaw shook. Nobody ever explained to me why they did this after running away or Rideau center. Several times I've been found and returned. I met a nice man\ Liel Nichols, at Rideau Reginal, who informed me that if I did not run away for a solid year, they will let me out. On May the 16th 1971 age of 18, I showed someone from that group came and picked me up, and I was happy and finally able to leave Rideau Regional center. Living there was like hell for me. It is great to talk about my story, but moving ahead in the future was difficulty because of the institution was blocking me. Many people offered to support me, but they could not get through to me. The institution was holding me back until I met Christina in 2014. And she helped me to see the way. The day I met Christina, I decided not to let the past take me down, but to live and be free from the past. First, I learned to love myself and to forgive anyone who hurt me. Then I learn to move, move on, and a balanced life after. After that I decided to share my story. Being able to share my story and experience of others has given me the knowledge and never ever let this happen to anyone again. I believe that sharing, such hardships in life are a big part of the healing process. I hope sharing my story will change the way people see others with disability. And I incourage those who have been abused to speak up and start the amazing healing process. My goal is to educate people about what happened in the institution is to do my best to ensure that this type of punishment and abuse doesn't happen again to any human being. Sexual abuse is the worst thing that can happen to anyone. Of the many others who where abused at Rideau Regional Centre some are dead, and their secrets lies with them. I'm still alive and I'm proud to be speaking for them. You just can't take a shower and wash away the horrible memories. I'm glad I did not succesfully end in my life. Because then I would just be another victim of abuse in an institution who takes his story to the grave. I'm a survivor. I know that someday I will die but I will rest well, because I actually did something that help our community and our world by speaking up for what I believe. I'm very happy today to be successful in my new life running Art Gallery, enjoying the things around me going camping, fishing, bicycle, photographing wildlife. I even enjoy the winter times in Northern Ontario. Yes, winter. I love it. I love to go snowshoeing and skiing. Learning how to do art on the computer with my photos is something I never did before. When I start to believe in myself all the worthless was gone and new creative door open for me. When I go home after telling my story, I would relive it and I would become very grumpy. Yes, me, grumpy inside. But I but I now found a way to handle these feelings. Taking photos, recreating art, finding other ways to solve the problems that have brought me to a
healing process with which also his humanity. My faith in God in the universe has helped my journey. One thing I do remember when I was in the institution, this prayer helped me a lot a lot. This prayer is for all the people who died in the institution. And our prayers are for the natives who's in the people that did not make it to. And did not get out to tell their story. The prayer insane is when I was in the institution I was there and I only remember one prayer that my foster mom taught me was the Lord is my shepherd. So every time I would get abused, I would never this prayer The Lord is my shepherd. And that's all I knew, until later I now I can read the whole thing. The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want He makes me lie down in green pastures needs me to say the still waters. He restores my soul. He leaves me in the past of the righteousness for his namesake. Yay do I walk through the valley of shadow of death of fear no evil for dow are with me thy rod and thy staff. they comfort me. Thou prepares the table before me, in the presence of enemies, dow anoints my head with my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life. I will do well, I will do well in the house of the Lord forever. Thank you, everyone for listen to my story. And thank you again.

Eric Goll 18:25

Joe, thank you so much for sharing your story. And it was really a difficult story for me to listen to, and I'm sure for the others that are going to listen to this podcast. I'm sure their stomach turned more than once, just like mine. And, you know, I could feel the emotion for the tragedy that happened to you and the terrible experience that you live through as a child from 12 to 18. And no child should ever have to go through what you went through Joe, sexual abuse and physical abuse and emotional mental abuse. It's It's terrible. One thing that comes through to me Joe was just your resiliency and how you were able to have that experience that terrible experience that traumatic experiences at young age and still become the man that you you are today and enjoying life. And there's, you know, it's so much for us to learn from from your stories, and thank you for sharing. And I think, you know, if anybody listened to your story, and you hadn't mentioned that you were in an institution, for people with developmental disabilities, they would have assumed that you were in jail, and it's just completely completely wrong. Thank heavens at that institution Rideau regional center is is closed, it probably took way too long to to close it. But thanks, heavens, it's closed. And many other people I imagine had terrible traumatic experiences and abusive experiences, such of yourself as yourself, and thank you for helping to be the voice of those people that are no longer with us or don't have a voice. So, there's there's a couple questions that I have for you, Joe, if that's okay.

Joe Clayton 20:34 Yep.

Eric Goll 20:38

So, you mentioned that you were you ran away a couple of times. And, it sounds like the third, eventually you were you were set free. Can you tell us about those experiences of trying to escape and get out.

Joe Clayton 20:59
When I ran away from the institution. You know, like I said, there was an electric fence that time. I was in very big, it was just enough, you can just probably jump over. But the train was usually stops. And but they would say, the staffs would tell everybody say, if you ran away three weeks or four weeks, or you didn't get caught, you'd be free. And it was like a game or to me now I think about it was like a game. So but I didn't run away because of what they said I ran away is because I wanted to get away from what happened to me in there. The abuse and the things I was afraid for my life. I mean, I was raped no and treated like a criminal, well, I didn't. I was treated. I was put in an institution because I had a disability. And to me, I was a normal child. There was so many people who did not have a developed disability who were normal people. I never just throwing them in there and locking them up and making names for them saying they had this or that or whatever.

Eric Goll 22:30
Right to your point, there's nothing that you did, you were born you and because of how

other people viewed you, they stuck you in this terrible institution or jail.

Joe Clayton 22:45
Well, they just thought this would be like I read my story, institutionalize me, it would be better for me. But that's what they thought that these places were good people to go in. And when I ran away, that's what you do when you're treated bad. You run away, you know yourself and in The Great Escape, they ran away. In prisons, they ran away. But let's go, I think we'll cut that one. But maybe The Great Escape, we saw the movie, how they ran away because the way they were treated. And so I just, I didn't run away because it was a contest or a game. I heard about it. But I was scared for my life. And I and I wanted to just to get out of there. So by running away, I did draw attention to somebody and came to me and says, I tell you what, if you stopped running away for a year, you'll be out and his word came true, and I was out. So I'm glad I did run away. Because if I didn't, who knows where I would be right to this day, so thanks to that person. And I'm very happy that staff did that, you know, for me,

Eric Goll 24:16
Right. If that hadn't happened, Joe, how long do you think you would have been forced to

stay in that institution or, you know, jailed in that institution?

Joe Clayton 24:28
Some people have spent their whole life in the institution. So we don't know. I could have been worse, you know, I mean, they were doing a lot of treatments. They're redoing a lot of things. Experiments. There's a lot of things that I don't even talk about it. I just don't know how to talk about it because it's inside of me what I saw, but, you know, it's like it's unbelievable. The things that I seen and saw, the treatments that they give people I probably would be in there for a long time. You know, I because you have to understand in those days the Children's Aid Society that's what they were doing because there isn't, there is no room for a lot of people. So they figured institutions would be the best place. They would get care and love and support.

Eric Goll 25:31
But you got the exact opposite. Neglect, abuse and torture.

Joe Clayton 25:36
When the workers would bring people myself in the institution. They look around and go Wow, it looks very nice here. They were making the place look lovely. So people would think the place was nice, nice chandaleirs in the dinning rooms. Let's say all bowling alleys, swiming pools, auditorium, movies, you know, you know, like the theater, we had our own theater. We had, we had our own doctors in there. We had our own food in there. So what they did they made it look like it was a wonderful place to be. Disney Land. Yeah, Disney Land. So then people go in there and they they look around and they go, wow, this is a good place for this, you know, whoever. And so we got I think it was I think there's a word for it. I'm trying to remember the word to make people think in their mind that this is what do you call that word when the government; conspiracy. Because a lot of people walk in there and they bring their kids in and they thought it was a wonderful place. They would try to make things look good. But the inside no. And and if you if you saw my pictures, I

think I sent them to you when I was in the institution, those smile in my face, they get you to smile. They ask you to smile, to show people that you're happy. So yeah, so there was a lot of things going on there. But the thing is that happened a long time ago. And today is reality and today's a new life. And today, I want people to hear my story and to realize that we're not monsters that came out of the institution. We were human beings, and we we just want to be love and be respectful. And we are we are here now. And we just want to be happy. That's right.

Eric Goll 26:36

And you're a living example of that. So there was a lot of trauma you experienced, that you shared with us. And you said you've gone through a process of forgiveness and learning to love and learning to love yourself. I would think that forgiveness would be a really hard thing for those people that abused you and sexually abused you. What was what was helpful for you to work through that forgiveness?

Joe Clayton 28:58
That's a good question. My God, and my faith help me to learn to forgive. And, it wasn't easy it was very hard at times. I had to see a PhD doctor because I didn't love myselfand so I had to learn to say that word. So I had some people there helping, to say this word love, I love myself and to forgive all the people that hurt me. It took a lot of healing inside. But what what when I asked God and my faith and God to help me. And when I cried out to God and say, Please help me. I think that faith helped me and we all have different ways to express that to go different ways to be healed, but that healing for me it's amazing how I don't feel as angry anymore. I said this happen a long time ago. And and now here I am. But it was hard. Yes, it was really hard but with with the great supports that I had, and the great people that around me who cared about me, who helped me through this, and all the churches that I've been and the ministers who helped me in this and prayed with me. I think that my faith has helped me a lot. I had to find something and I found something, and I don't go and preach to anybody, I just live it every day and try to do my best.

Eric Goll 31:18

Yeah. Thanks for sharing that. Joe. What are your thoughts on what should happen with the institutions that are still operational Today. Many have been closed, but there are still institutions or institution like settings that people with developmental disabilities are being put in where it's not their choice. And I think even when I think about it, you know, group homes for example, where there might be four or six or eight people with a developmental disability being told that they all need to live in the same house and not really having a choice in that is still an institutional model. What are your thoughts on that? What do you think should happen with that in those institutions that do exist are institutionalized models such as group homes.

Joe Clayton 32:20
I think what I'm trying to say is, the reason why I'm reading my story institutions that are here today and group homes, they will hear my story, and they'll learn something from it. And they, and it will maybe help them to grow or maybe it'll help them to just do something that maybe we'll help them through my story. So yeah, and choose better staffs. Maybe or whatever. Yeah, it's just just Yeah.

Eric Goll 33:06
What Joe, what's your, your message for the world in terms of how people with developmental disabilities need to be treated.

Joe Clayton 33:17
We as the people, disabilities, we cry just like everybody else. We laugh like everybody else. We are human beings just like everybody else. And like I said before, we just want the world to know we are not monsters who got out of institutions. We are human beings, and we need to be respected and to be loved. And we don't need to be treated like babies. We need to be treated and treated like a human being and we... Yeah, that's that's it.

Eric Goll 34:04

Yeah, I couldn't agree with you more Joe and, you know, everybody's rights, people with developmental disabilities included, need to be recognized and honored and people disability to be treated just like everybody else. So I completely agree with what you're what you're saying and I and that goes for having choice in their life and being able to choose where they're going to live, what they're going to do, and, and you're a great example, Joe and from you sharing your story in terms of what's possible when somebody is given the right support and somebody's given, you know, tools and resources and you know, you've been able to create a wonderful life with yourself, even though you've gone through those very traumatic experiences. So moving forward just into today, Joe, can you share us with us a little bit more? You mentioned your art gallery if you could share a little bit more about your art gallery, your art and maybe where people could find you either online or getting get in touch with you to learn more.

Joe Clayton 35:22
Yes, we're good. It's quick because I'm going out. I'm going out on my phone. So we'll do it fast. Yeah, people can contact me. Log on Facebook, the Nature Natives's Art Gallery, and they can see Christina and my artwork. In the notes of the podcast episode all include your details. https://www.facebook.com/NatureNativesArtGallery And I have a business card. It's called Joe Clayton motive motive. Motor motivational and advocate speaker, a voice to the nation and I've been passing these cards out everywhere too so if people want to hire me to come out and speak I can and I don't know if I get my email out.

Eric Goll 36:26

all include it in the in the show notes in the blog for you. Joe's Email: williamjc53@gmail.com So I want to respect your your time here. And yes, I'm super grateful that you came on and shared your story with us and I, you know, I've learned a lot from you and I really admire your resiliency and your strength and your courage to share your very important story with us. So thank you so much for for sharing with me and and the rest of theworld.

Joe Clayton 37:00
Thank you. And I just want to thank you very much for inviting me to speak and give me the privilege to speak about my story and opportunity and and just say keep safe and everybody, and we'll be back to normal soon.

Eric Goll 37:25

Thanks, Joe. So a big thank you today to Joe Clayton for sharing his story and experiences with us. The acts forced upon Joe are horrible and no human should ever have to endure those experiences again. By Joe sharing his story hopefully it pushes us to continue to be better, to do better, to value all people. To value people with disabilities. To value indigenous people. To value black people. To value people of color. To value LGBTQ plus people. The social and injustices we're seeing today might look a little bit different than what we heard from Joe, but they still exist. They exist in our systems. They're programmed into our societies and they're programmed into us. We have to do better. I'm Eric Goll. Thank you for listening.

 

 

#061: The Power Of Positive Vision, with Lorna Sullivan

Lorna Sullivan, a global disability leader who is making significant changes inside the New Zealand social system. Lorna is the founder of the International Initiative for Disability Leadership (IIDL) and Director of Mana Whaikaha. I had the pleasure of learning from Lorna when she was part of the faculty in Michael Kendrick's Optimal Individualized Service Design Course. 

 

In this podcast, we cover a wide range of topics, including: 

• doing away with deficit-based assessments, 
• enhancing a person's mana (explanation inside the podcast), 
• the power of holding a positive vision, 
• the rights of people with disabilities,
• tools for social inclusion, 
• and much more!

 

 

About Lorna Sullivan:

Lorna became involved in being an advocate for people with disabilities by accident. She began her study in the field of Psychology, where she was first exposed to people with disabilities who she didn't know existed because they were hidden from the rest of society. 

 

Lorna realized the damage that is done when a group of people, through no fault of their own, are marginalized from the rest of society and have no mechanism to find their way back.

 

Lorna shares, "If we continue to view disabled people as human tragedy and the best we can do for these people is to care for them; we will continue to deny them every aspect of life that we hold to be valuable." 

 

Lorna helps us understand people with disabilities are the same as every other person, the same human needs, aspirations, and desires. She is on a mission to include people in all areas of society.

 

 

Lorna on Inclusion 

 

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Lorna shares:

 

There is a fear of rejection, and in many cases, actual rejection is true.

 

My experience has been society wants to engage with people that have disabilities, but they don't know how to. We need to give them [people] the tools to do that [engage]. 

 

The best tool that we have to create more inclusion in society is to keep people close. If a person with disabilities is with other valued people in the Community, it makes it easier for other valued people to communicate with a person with disabilities. It normalizes the person.

 

 

Tweetable Quotes from Lorna:

 

"Never resort to the special, unless you have exhausted the ordinary. If we start in the special, we will always end in the special."

 

"The only thing that will change the trajectory of the lives of people with disabilities is where you have strong families, with strong vision - you have competent disabled people. Where you don't irrespective of the capacity of that person, you have dependency."

 

"Holding a very strong vision for a positive, meaningful, and full life isn't a trivial thing. If you don't hold this vision through the hard times, you will get blown anyway the wind is blowing."

 

This podcast with Lorna Sullivan is jam-packed with wisdom and is a must listen!

 

Also, if you like ideas discussed in this podcast, you are going to love the upcoming FREE Masterclass Workshop Series that guides families to build a strong vision for a positive, meaningful and full life that Lorna was talking about! Click Here to Sign up for free.

 

 

Love & Respect,

Eric

 

 

 

Resources:

Mana Whaikaha website: https://manawhaikaha.co.nz/

 

The International Initiative for Disability Leadership (IIDL) website: http://www.iimhl.com/iidl-homepage.html

Taking Charge of Life, with Libby Ellis

Separated from her brother at childhood, Libby shares her journey of supporting her brother to create a great life. 

 

Enjoy this conversation with Libby Ellis, sibling, and founder of In Charge, a consulting organization in western Australia that is assisting people with disabilities to be the authors and champions of their own lives.

 

About Libby Ellis:

Libby works for a vivid vision of inclusion. She has walked many steps with her brother, Matthew, and for 20 years she has assisted others in taking front stage in their own lives. She supports people through the experiences, lessons, successes, and failures in self-direction over an extended period. Libby’s vision is to bring a personalized, heart understanding of what it takes to be in charge. Libby lives in Sydney, Australia with her husband, Sebastian.

 

Libby’s Story:

On the podcast, Libby shares her family experience. This blog captures a summary of her story; I recommend that you listen to the podcast to get the full version!

Libby lives in Sydney, Australia and has two brothers. A younger brother James and older brother Mathew (who has a disability). She is married to Sebastian (who is Canadian).

Matthew moved out of the family home when he was just nine years old. He moved into a medium-sized institution, where about 15 other people lived. Later on, the institution got broken up into smaller group homes. When her parents asked for help, that was the solution. For many families, this is still the proposed solution.

Libby started to realize these injustices that Mathew was faced with when she was in her mid to late teens. Matthew’s experience was a trigger for her rights based / social justice thinking. Libby was transformed through love and witnessing Matthews experiences in a disabled world. She saw his pain, vulnerability, powerlessness, and lack of control.

Libby’s family helped Matthew move out of the group home when he was 26. Her childhood experience was one of separation from her brother and trying to understand why it had to be that way.

 

How did the separation from your brother impact you?

Libby: “I started to ask why? It has led me on my path, and in my career to date. It has taken me to a lot of lessons and experiences that I have experienced over the last 25 years of my career.”

 

Can you share Matthew’s experience of separation?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Libby shares: 
“Matthew doesn’t speak and hasn’t yet been able to share his experience. He can understand, but he is missing expressive language to share his thoughts and his feelings.

From my perspective, he experienced some not very nice things. He has some behaviors that developed as coping mechanisms. When I look at pictures of him from that time vs. images of him now, there is such a difference, and it isn’t a difference of age. I can see the impact of the disabling environment that he was in.”

 

How did you make the move out of the group home?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Libby shares: 
“Because he couldn’t articulate his experience himself, we had to come up with a decision-making process and take a leap of faith to help him move out of the group home. Meeting with other peers and people that have gone before you, then you can see the thing that you want because someone else has created it and is living it. You can then see the pathway forward – this is so important.

You can see the evidence, or indicators, to a good life, that is there in other people’s lives, but they aren’t there in your family; this can help to take that leap of faith.”

 

How did you breaking through communication and behavioral barriers?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Libby shares:

This is an ongoing challenge. We had the questions: Who is going to want to live with Matthew? Who is going to want to care for him?

It is what I call the “what ifs..” It is helpful to list out the ‘What If’s…”

What if… Someone does something to him..
What if… He loses the key…
What if… xyz…

This then becomes the basis for the safeguarding system we built.

We need to step into the unknown, but before that, there is a lot of planning and preparing.

By trusting and having a sound safeguarding system in place, we have found people, and people are out there. Sometimes it takes a while to find the right person.”

Eric shares, “ It is a myth that people that have a disability have to live with other people that have disabilities.”

Libby shares, “It is hard work. The social model of disability teaches us that it is going to be hard work. But, it was also hard work when Matthew was in institutional settings. In institutional settings, it was hard work to make a change because of the powerlessness [against the organization]. Now it [the social model] is hard work, just a different kind of hard work. For example, finding someone to live with Matthew. But now we have control and power.”

 

What are some of the other key lessons you learned?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Libby shares: 
“We are not automatically an advocate. Families are blocked by low expectations, not having a sense of what is possible, past negative experiences. We are often making choices within very narrow perspectives.

Also, there is a difference in advocating for ourselves and others. Families need to be careful about what we ask for and what we create. The history of what has been created by families includes many of the services that have been started, and there is a pattern of segregation as a result.”

Eric: As families, it is our responsibility to educate ourselves. Take workshops, connect with thought leaders, listen to podcasts, and connect with families leading the inclusion movement. One step you can take is to take the FREE Empowering Ability Mini-Course. To learn more click here.

Libby and I also discuss the topics of life being more than a service, the impact of agency, family constellations (psychotherapist, Bert Hellinger), and tipple win thinking. You can hear all of these insights by clicking play on the podcast player below!

 

I express my sincere gratitude to Libby for coming on the podcast and sharing her story and wisdom!

 

Love & Respect,

Eric

 

Resources:

Libby’s Website: Incharge.net.au
Email: Hello@Incharge.net.au
Connect with Libby on linkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/chargeaustralia/

Sexuality and Disability, with Dr. Margaret Newbury Jones

In this conversation with Dr. Margaret Newbury Jones, here out referred to as Margaret, of SHADE Consulting and Counselling we dive into the topic of sexuality and disability. We discuss what self-advocates, families, and supporters need to know about sexuality and Intellectual/developmental disability (IDD). She answers the questions; Why is knowing the language of our bodies so important? Where do I go to find a partner?, What is the role of a paid supporter, and Should we be allowed to have sex and watch porn in the group home?.

Margaret’s career has focused on working with folks of all ages with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD) and other disabilities for 25+ years. She worked as a public-school special educator for 15 years before beginning to work as a consultant and counsellor focusing on trauma, sexual health and folks with IDD. She works directly with clients with IDD as well as their families and supporters and is known for providing engaging workshops for families, self-advocates, front line workers, and other professionals. She is most importantly a family member of a sibling with IDD, her best teacher.

 

Why is it so important for us to talk about sexuality for people with an intellectual or developmental disability (IDD)?

Margaret: “Everyone is a sexual being; it doesn’t matter if you have a disability or not.”

Eric: Other than sexually transmitted infections (STIs), pregnancy, general health are there other reasons we need to be talking about sexuality for people that have an IDD?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Margaret shares; “Safety. People with IDDs are much more vulnerable to being abused and taken advantage of. Also, a lot of it is about autonomy and making informed decisions and not feeling like someone else gets to make those choices for you. We don’t have to allow others to make those decisions, that is a person’s right [to make those decisions] when they are an adult.

 

In terms of statistics, now big of a problem is sexual abuse?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Margaret shares, “There aren’t any good solid stats – the research you referenced is from the 80s and 90s. [Eric referenced stat – 83% of women, 35% of men with IDD are sexually abused] The stats can vary from 2 percent to 60 percent. But what we do know, is that rates of sexual abuse for people with IDDs higher than the general population. Also, just like the general population, people with IDDs don’t report, don’t know how to report, [or don’t have the language to know they were sexually abused as we discuss below].”

 

What do self-advocates need to know about sexual health?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Margaret shares: “Language – if folks don’t have the right language to tell us that something happened, how can they tell us? If you don’t know the language of your body, how can you tell somebody when something goes wrong?”

Margaret shares a story sex educator Meg Hickling’shttps://www.amazon.ca/Books-Meg-Hickling/s?rh=n%3A916520%2Cp_27%3AMeg+Hickling work where Meg was going into prisons and working with inmates and teaching them sexual health. When she had the opportunity, she spoke to sex offenders and asked them how they looked for their victims. The sex offenders told her that they look for people that don’t have the right language for their bodies. They said to her that if they do have the right language, they are more likely to tell. If they don’t have the language, they are less likely to tell because they aren’t having those conversations.

We also go deeper into the topic of consent on the podcast.

Margaret also shares that it is important that people that have an IDD know the basics of sexuality, sexual health, healthy relationships. On the podcast, she answers one of the most common questions she is asked by her clients with an IDD, “Where do you meet or find a partner?”

 

What do families need to know about sexual health?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Margaret shares;

1) Make sure they have the language of their body.
2) Role of a supporter is a bridge to relationships, not to be the relationship.
3) As families, we need to let the person grow up and not be a perpetual child. If you are 50, you still have 50 years of life experience.
4) Recognize that puberty can be one of the most normalizing things that has or will happen to a person with an IDD.

What comes up in your work around menstruation?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Margaret shares;

People are put on birth control to manage menstrual periods because families and caregivers feel like it is challenging to manage menstruation. We can teach menstrual management. Families will also say that the person is protected if someone abuses them. Margaret’s response is, “Does that make abuse okay?” We should be keeping them safe from the get-go.

We also discuss the issue of consent and menstrual management on the podcast.

Margaret shares, “We tend to do things that are timely. We don’t take the time to make sure that people fully understand, fully consent, and fully process what is going on.”

 

What do supporters and organizations need to know about sexual health?

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Margaret shares;

1) Define the role of the supporter as a bridge to a relationship, not being the relationship.
2) Organizations need to have a sexual health policy. Everything is then dealt with similarly, and it addresses the individual sets of values that people delivering the support have.
3) Supporters need to be aware of their own beliefs and values.

We also get into interesting questions of:

Should people with disabilities be able to have sex in the group home?

Should people with disabilities be able to watch porn?

To hear these answers, you need to listen to the podcast!

I thank Margaret for the engaging conversation and for sharing her wealth of knowledge on sexual health. Margaret has also provided us with a library of resources on sexuality and disability below.

Love & Respect,
Eric

 

Resources:

Sunny Hill Education Resource Centre (SHERC) – This is a lending library with many sexual health-related materials.

Email: sherc@cw.bc.ca

Website: www.bcchildrens.ca/sherc

Sexuality Education for People with Developmental Disabilities (2018) – Elevatus Training – www.elevatustraining.com

Life Cycle – How We Grow and Change: A Human Development and Sexuality Education Curriculum. Varicheck, S.M. & Tolle, R.K. (2008). Life Cycle Education Consultants. www.lifecycleeducation.com

www.real-talk.org

 

Websites (these are a combination of safe sexuality websites as well as websites addressing trauma/self-regulation):

• www.beaconhouse.org.uk
• www.safehandsthinkingminds.co.uk
• www.self-reg.ca
• www.northstarpaths.com
• www.booksbeyondwords.co.uk
• www.tascalberta.com
• www.teachingsexualhealth.ca
• www.safehealthschools.org
• www.urbandictionary.com
• www.pflagcanada.ca
• www.advocatesforyouth.org
• www.sexualityandu.ca
• www.planetahead.ca
• www.plannedparenthood.org/info-for-teens
• www.wontgetweird.com
• www.teenhealthsource.com
• www.goaskalice.columbia.edu
• www.teengrowth.com

 

 

Books

• Asperger’s Syndrome and Sexuality: From Adolescence through Adulthood – Henault, I (2006). Jessica Kingsley Publisher
• Autism-Asperger’s and Sexuality – Puberty and Beyond – Newport, J & Newport, M. (2002). Future Horizons
• Boys, Girls, and Body Science – Hickling, M. Harbour Publishing
• A Five is Against the Law! Social Boundaries: Stright UP! An Honest Guide for Teen and Young Adults – Dunn Buron, K. (2007). Autism Asperger Publishing Co.
• It’s Perfectly Normal: A Book About Changing Bodies, Growing UP, Sex and Sexual Health – Harri, R. (1994). Candlewick Press
• Protocol for Personal Care (Adult or child) – Available at Community Options http://communityoptions.bc.ca/about-us/protocol-books/
• Sex, Sexuality and the Autism Spectrum – Lawson, W. (2005). Jessica Kingsley Publishers

 

Dr. Margaret Newbury Jones Contact Information

www.shadeconsulting.ca

778-215-0132

info@shadeconsulting.ca

#058: What I learned Moving Out of Mom and Dad’s

It has been a little over one year since my sister, Sarah has come onto the podcast – and a lot has changed for Sarah. The most significant change has been Sarah moving out of mom and dad’s and into a home of her own. This single decision to move out of mom and dad’s made 1000 decisions for Sarah and our family. This one decision for Sarah to have a home of her own has allowed her to grow into the capable young woman that she wants to be.

 

Before the Move

On the podcast, Sarah shares her journey starting from leaving the school system and spending the better part of a decade living in our parent’s basement.

Sarah shares, “Mom and Dad did everything for me. I had no choice [living in their home].”

Our parents (and me) made decisions and did everything for Sarah - we acted out of love and with the best intentions… BUT, this created the institution of home. I’ve realized a person doesn't have to live in an institution or a group home to have choice and control stripped away.

Eventually, Sarah pushed hard to have her voice heard, which created a lot of conflict and tension in our family. It caused enough pain and pressure for our family to finally act instead of continuing to live our lives by default. We had a lot of conversations as a family and engaged with a facilitator to help moderate the discussion and plan an optimal path forward. Sarah wants a place of her own; however, mom and dad thought it was too big of a jump. So, we all agreed on the interim step of Sarah and me living together for two years.

 

The Experience of Moving out and Mom and Dad’s

July 2018, Sarah moved out of mom and Dad’s place and in with me (her brother).

On the podcast, Sarah shares how the move out of mom and dad’s house gave her the change of environment needed to open the door for her to develop valued roles of; contributing adult, roommate, and daughter. She also shares the ups and downs she has experienced in her new home when it comes to:

Decision making: significant increases in choice and control

Supporters: building and managing her support team (in replacement of mom’s caregiving)

Opportunity to do everyday things: meals, laundry, cleaning, etc.

Dealing with overwhelm.

Breaking down co-dependency: shifting the relationship with mom from caregiver to mother.

*Take a listen to the podcast to hear these insights.

 

What was helpful for you in making this change?

Sarah discusses the three things that were most helpful for her:

1. My support circle; helped to make decisions, to provide new ideas and perspectives, and to provide social and emotional support.
2. Talking through challenges to process how she was feeling.
3. Meditation.

Take a listen to this podcast to get Sarah’s perspective and the wisdom she has to offer you!

Bonus: If we aren't there for our loved one with a disability, who will be?

... If I am not there to care and look out for my son or daughter, then who will be? It is a big question, but it is also something we avoid talking about because we have to realize our own death. BUT, if we don't have these conversations - what are we leaving behind?! 

From the hundreds of families I have spoken with I've learned that it is a massive hole. If you are the go-to person for your loved one with a disability, and they are dependent on you and you aren't there for them anymore it is impossible for one person to step into your old shoes. It causes a ton of stress, anxiety, and disrupts several people's lives. 

This is why we need to think about the relationships in our loved one's life, this is why we need to be intentional about a Personal Support Network. In this video, I show you how to do this.

CLICK HERE to learn how.

 
Enjoy,

Eric

 

PS. Having a strong Personal Support Network for your loved one with a disability is the best way I've found to support someone after their parents can no longer care. BUT - a Personal Support Network is more than that, it will provide in ways that you could have never imagined in the short term.

CLICK HERE to learn how!

Bonus: The two things successful families are doing

Over the past few years, I’ve been thinking deeply about how to best support families with a loved one with a disability to create a happy and full life for their loved one - and a good life that isn’t dependent on parents (forever)…

I know this is possible because I have friends with disabilities who have created this life - my family is going through this transformation, and the families I work with are going through this transformation. In this video, I share one of their stories with you.

 ... and I've found that there is there is ONE key thing in common for all of these families… They have Created a Vision!

As families, we need to be able to imagine the best possible life for our loved one with a disability so that we can then create it.
 

Well, actually there are TWO things all of these families have in common. There are two paths that you can choose as a family (and neither is risk-free). In this video, I tell you about these two paths - and I share with you the ONE path that these families are choosing to create the best life possible for their loved one.

Bonus: How to create and deepen relationships

As families, we have the question of who will care for our loved one with a disability when we no longer can?

People with intellectual and developmental disabilities have less than 20% of the number of relationships compared to a typical person. 

This leads to loneliness, which is more harmful to our health than smoking a pack of cigarettes every day.
 
In this video, I explain how to build relationships. 

You can create a happy and full life for your loved one with a developmental or intellectual disability - that isn't reliant on you. You can make this transformation happen for your loved one and your family. 

To do this... We must elevate our expectations for what is possible. 

Start by focusing on relationships. In this video, I also show you how to create and deepen relationships for your loved one.

#057: Imagining Better, with Michael Kendrick

How to create a life worth living? … am I implying that there are lives that aren’t worth living? This a big question that I ask you to consider for yourself.

 

People with developmental disabilities are devalued and suppressed (largely unconsciously) by society, our families and even ourselves (I am guilty too).

 

When a person is devalued, it is very difficult to access the opportunities that everyone else can access, and often results in isolation, loneliness, and suffering. Again, I ask - A life worth living?

 

Well, what I do know, is that I can do better, and we can do better, and our society can do better.

 

And, and it starts with a vision.

 

Why do we need vision? Well, as human beings the sense that we trust the most is our eyes, we are looking out for dangers and rewards. Also, where we look is where we go - If we are surfing and we are looking at the rocks, we will end up on the rocks, if we are looking at the beach, we will end up on the beach. Here I am talking about vision as one of our 5 human senses. However, these truths about our sense of vision apply to our future. If we can imagine, or see in our minds, where we want to be 5 years from now... we can trust that we can get there, and we move in that direction. We are looking at the destination we want to get to 5 years from now and will move in that direction, just like the surfer that looks at the beach and steps off their board into the soft sand (instead of crying out for help to be saved while being pushed upon the jagged rocks).

 

 

In this conversation with Michael Kendrick, we discuss 'Imagining Better" and we attempt to answer; What is vision? Why is vision so important for people with IDDs? and, How do you go about creating a Vision?

 

 

Michael Kendrick PhD. is a well-known international consultant in Human Services. Michael is involved in consulting, education and evaluative work with many governments, private agencies, advocacy groups, community organizations, universities and colleges across the globe. His work has involved training, evaluations, strategic planning, critical problem solving and confidential advice in the areas of mental health, disability and aging with an emphasis on persons requiring long term support.

 

What is Vision (the future looking kind)?

 

MK: "It is the way we see the world. It differs from one person to another. It is possible for people to have different content in their vision. We might have no vision on some subjects because we have never seen them before, where other areas we might have detailed visions. Vision might change over time - our life experiences shift our vision.

 

For example, the decision to see the good in people would be a way to approach people as if there is good in people. If your vision is that people are nasty or unpleasant, then the way you will see people are nasty because that is what you are looking for."

 

 

 

Why is it important for an individual with a Developmental Disability to have a vision?

 

MK: "A vision with opportunities can create life-giving possibilities. Without that there can be no sense that these possibilities exist. [For example] A lot of people with disabilities were raised with the belief that work and employment would not be a part of their future. This persuades people through conditioning and reinforcements [what they will not work] through other people’s world views. This might mean that people have many undeveloped, unrecognized potentials and capacities that are never explored because of the limited vision for them and also the conviction that they don’t exist."

 

EG: If you don’t have a plan, you are part of someone else’s plan, and their plan might not be that good for you.

 

 

Society's Collective Vision:

 

MK: "There is also a collective vision for society, such as the indigenous people in Canada is one that is devaluing. All societies tend to produce devalued groups at the margins. People might not be conscious of it at the surface."

 

 

People with DDs are devalued by society. How do you break free of societal devaluation?

 

MK: "A disability is seen as a negative feature of a person, people then generalize from the disability to the person entirely. You are no longer a full human being, you are a human being that is lacking. If you wanted to change that, then you would have to say that your disability need not impact the fullness of your life potentials.

 

With the person-centered movement – it is the person that matters, not the disability. It starts with what is the fullness of this person’s humanity and how can this be realized. The person is seen as full of potentials, notwithstanding that they live with some sort of impairment.

 

Be honest and accurate about the disability, but not giving it more emphasis than its needs. Living with the impairment in a practical way."

 

 

 

How do we go about creating a vision?

 

MK: "People with developmental disabilities are much more likely to be in segregated settings.

 

We can ask, What would be the inclusive or socially integrated option, vs the segregated option?

 

Families have been schooled for the segregated option. Need to ask the question, what would the inclusive option be?

 

There might be impediments, but that doesn’t mean the person can’t join, but we just need to figure out how to overcome it. What would support the person to be successful in that situation?

 

Vision can shift, and it can create new life opportunity. Vision creates realities.

 

From Social Role Valorization (SRV) we can look at the Culturally Valued Analog (CVA). [CVA is simply] What would a person of the same age be typically doing with their life? If you are 6 years old, would you be in school? If you are 25 years old, would you be working or furthering your studies? It helps people look at things in normative terms, which builds vision for what the person could conceivably access.

 

You find your place in the CVA, to do what suits you by following things you might be interested in. CVA is massive and there are so many opportunities, you just need to find what appeals to you. [You can ask] What resonates with that person’s nature?"

 

 

 

Where do I start when creating a vision?

 

MK: Always do things with others. This gives you more resources than trying to do it yourself. Not everyone is good at imagining better, you want to pick people that are imaginative. You build vision over time - revisit and refashion on an ongoing basis.

 

 

Should you discuss shared world views and values before starting the visioning process with others?

 

MK: "To the extent that you can do this, it is very consciousness raising. It makes us aware of values, principals and also priorities that people have. For instance, people don’t like to do things that are difficult. When you are going to break new ground, you have to open yourself up to new challenges. You have to look for people that can not only imagine better but are also interested in the doing.

 

[Also,] seek examples of imaging better. If someone has already achieved what you are doing, it is conceivable. For example, in the early days when we were trying to get people a home of their own, there weren’t many examples. Now there are many.

 

See what people have already accomplished. Stories and videos.

 

Join social networks that share a common interest. For example, joining a group of other progressive-minded families. It is harder to do this in isolation."

 

If you are looking for examples and ideas a good place to start is the Partners For Planning Learning Centre. 

 

 

 

Michael Kendrick and I also discuss family mentorship, role modeling, life-giving vs live-denying choices, and leadership on the podcast. These are important parts of the conversation, which you can access by clicking on the player below.

 

In closing MK Shares (in summary):

 

“Vision won't prosper unless there are leaders that mobilize people around the vision. You have to have buy-in and you have to win the buy-in of others. [This is] Not just individual leadership, but collective leadership. Investments in visionary leadership are a good investment. You also need leadership renewal because it is a long journey. People need ways to become renewed and to get energy. A lot of this comes in the way of social networks. Renewal of vision is important, so you need renewal. It takes leadership to get the implementation of vision.”

 

 

If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit.

 

The Empowering Ability Podcast and Blog are made possible entirely by you, the support of listeners and readers. Thank you for considering a contribution to this work with a subscription!

 

 

Love & Respect,

Eric Goll

 

#056: How To Create The Good Life, with Genia Stephen

Here is the secret.... it is to start with developing valued roles. What is a valued role? A valued roles is the answer you give to the question 'What do you do?' when you meet someone new. [more on valued roles below] Guest Genia Sthphen also shares her story as a sibling, a mother to two sons, and how she has helped to create the good life for her son Will.

 

Professionally, Genia is a midwife to many, and an activist with a mission to band together with families to joyfully pursue the good things in life. She recently launched the Good Things in Life, which is an online community for young families who share a vision of the good life for their kids with disabilities. 

 

 

You can listen to this conversation in its entirety by clicking play on the player below, OR by clicking one of the following links to listen on your favourite podcast player; iTunes, Spotify, and Google Play.

 

Growing Up With a Sibling that has a Developmental Disability (DD)

 

Genia is the 3rd of 4 daughters, and her younger sister Kate has a DD. Genia’s two older sisters are a fair amount older, and it was really just the two of them (Kate & Genia) when they were growing up.

 

Genia remembers going to appointments with Kate where they had Kate do silly things, like hold onto the pencil, and they would pull on it until she let it go. Kate didn’t care much for holding onto the pencil and as a result, was diagnosed with having poor muscle tone. But, Genia and Kate thought it was funny because Kate would drag Genia around the house on her back by her toes. 

 

Genia recalls, “At 5 mom sat me down on her lap and told me that Kate had a disability. Mom was serious, it was an occasion, She explained Kate would learn more slowly than other kids. I responded by crying. I was trying to figure out what was expected in this situation, and it was clear to her that the appropriate response was to be sad.”

 

It was a big deal for Genia’s mom. She had never experienced someone with a disability, Her mom was terrified, intimidated, and overwhelmed. It was something worth crying about for her.

 

Genia’s mom reached out and started to connect with other parents and other people that knew more than she did. She surrounded herself with this community and exploded into a powerful advocate. She stopped delivering the information in a way that elicited sadness and started having really high expectations. She had connected with some people that had worked with Dr. Wolf Wolfensberger, who developed the social theory of Social Role Valorization (SRV).

 

Genia attended her first SRV workshop at 15. It taught her language, and how the world works for people that are devalued.

 

Key Insight: Connecting with other families is important. Not just getting connected, but who you get connected with. What are their beliefs and mindsets? How you deal with grief and fear is guided by your mindsets and fear for a person with a disability.

 

 

When Genia’s second son Will was born he was very very sick. Genia recalls, "we weren’t sure he was going to make it. They were telling the family that he would have significant disabilities." Genia’s response was “Well yeah yeah yeah, but is he going to make it, let's focus on what matters here. And he did [make it!].”

 

 

What is Social Role Valorization (SRV)?

 

GS: “SRV is the universal ways that people are devalued in society. Devalued people are not able to access the good things in life the way that valued people are. For example, devalued people do not have the same opportunities for personal growth, education, meaningful work, freely given relationships, pursuing their interests. People access the good things in life through the roles we play in society. It is also how we connect and understand each other. One of the first questions we ask someone is “what do you do?”. It helps us understand and relate to each other through roles.”

 

 

There is No Risk-Free Path

 

GS: “If your major fear is that someone is going to be hurt or rejected, and the way that you prevent that is by keeping people protected and isolated from the people that might hurt them, then that leads you down a vision that likely includes a lot of services and people paid to keep the person safe.

 

Alternatively, if your mindsets and beliefs are that safety for vulnerable people comes through relationships, this leads you down a path of life in the community.

 

There is no risk-free path.”

 

 

What Does The Good Life Look Like for Will?

 

Listen to the podcast to hear how Genia’s family has thought about the role of student for Will. Genia and her family thought through the things that were likely to increase people’s high expectation and positive image of Will in the role of student, starting from the age of 2!

 

GS: “Will is now 12, and we think about for his peer group what are the typical valued social roles that a person holds? And, what are the kinds of opportunities that those roles bring? Then we pursue those things.”

 

Want proof!?! Watch the video below.

 

 

Video: Will Enjoying The Good Things In Life

 

Key Insight: Look to what is typical for people that don’t have a disability at that stage of life and focus on the roles the individual could hold to create your vision. Additionally, the person supporting needs to understand the social role and also have the social currency to help them get there.

 

 

In this podcast, Genia and I also cover topics including raising the consciousness of devaluation in our society, the experience of being a mother with a child that has a disability, and what the experience of having a sibling with a disability. 

 

Tweet-able Moments from the conversation with Genia Stephen:

 

"Devalued people are not able to access the good things in life the way that valued people are. For example, devalued people do not have the same opportunities for personal growth, education, meaningful work, freely given relationships, pursuing their interests."

 

"...if your mindsets and beliefs are that safety for vulnerable people comes through relationships, this leads you down a path of life in the community."

 

"Look to what is typical for people that don’t have a disability at that stage of life and focus on the roles the individual could hold to create your vision."

 

 

 

 

If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit.

 

The Empowering Ability Podcast and Blog are made possible entirely by you, the support of listeners and readers. Thank you for considering a contribution to this work with a subscription!

 

 

Love & Respect,

Eric Goll

 

 

 

 

Resources:

 

Will Social Media: Theadventuresofwill.ca  

 

The Good Things in Life --> For Parents of young children with IDDs. Goodthingsinlife.org.

 

Contact Genia by email: Genia@goodthingsinlife.org

 

Creating Valued Roles with Janet Klees: Click Here

 

 

 

 

 

Too Busy to listen to the podcast now? Listen on the GO!

 

The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and all other major podcast apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!

 

#055: Navigating Grief, with Yvonne Heath

Yvonne defines grief, how to support others that are grieving, and shares her 7 takeaways to navigate through life, grief, and end of life.

 

In this episode of the Empowering Ability podcast, we have an in-depth conversation on grief with nurse and author, Yvonne Health. In this conversation, Yvonne defines grief, how to support others that are grieving, the difference between quality and quantity of life, and her 7 takeaways to navigate through life, grief, and end of life.  Yvonne is an inspirational Speaker, author of the book ‘Love Your Life to Death’, and a TV and Radio host.

 

(Note: 25% of 'Love Your Life to Death' book sales purchased through this link go directly to Community Living Ontario)
 

 

You can listen to this conversation in its entirety by clicking play on the player below, OR by clicking one of the following links to listen on your favourite podcast player; iTunes, Spotify, and Google Play.

 

Why Are We Talking About Grief?

 

YH: “I didn’t choose this, it chose me. Looking back at a 27-year nursing career we don’t talk about grief, we don’t talk about death and dying until it arrives. Then we try and navigate through it. This causes excessive suffering. Grief is a part of our journey, but by avoiding it we are creating excessive suffering.”

 

Seeing this suffering as a nurse Yvonne had to do something about it, so she took a leap of faith wrote a book about it, and here we are.

 

As as a nurse, Yvonne became attached to people and she suffered tremendously. She realized this and she became aware of how she was suffering and became curious about it. This led her to have more conversations with other carers.

 

YH: “I asked fellow caregivers, are we well prepared for grief death and dying? And they said, no. Then I’d have conversations with two people with the same diagnosis of terminal cancer and their families and see drastically different experiences. One family was acknowledging and allowing all feelings - laughing and crying and being open, and being truthful about what was happening. That person died more peacefully and the family navigated through their grief and was able to get through and find happiness again. Then there were other families who were angry and bitter, and demanding more treatments and there weren’t conversations being had. There was no eye contact, I could feel the suffering. I could see this over and over, and I had this inner voice telling me we had to see something different.”

 

 

What is Grief?

 

YH: "Grief is whatever makes your heartache. Often it is death, but it can be divorce, a diagnosis, complications at birth, job loss, not making the team. Grief is a part of our life. Anger is often a very big part of grief, and it can come out."

 

 

How Do We Support Someone Experiencing Grief?

 

YH: “I [we often] don’t know what to do, I [we often] don’t know what to say. We are more comfortable avoiding people when they are grieving. But the most important thing is that we need people to just show up. A hug, a text, an email, sit in silence. Just sit with someone and acknowledge and allow their feelings and not try and fix it. You can’t fix grief, you just have to allow it. We have to get back to allowing our humanness. You are qualified to just show up.”

 

Quality of Life vs. Quantity of Life.

 

YH: “What is enough quality of life is enough for one person isn’t acceptable for another person. There is always a treatment that we can do, but the question is should we? Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we have the conversation before something happens? The time to have these conversations is not when you are facing life or death situations.”

 

EG: “We can create a thought experiment for ourselves and think - okay if I got cancer and I was given a prognosis of 2 years to live with intensive treatment that is going to reduce my quality of life for that time, or I could have 6 months to live with a high quality of life. Which would I choose? And, you can do this now from a rational place now, rather than a fear-based place when actually faced with the decision. This decision will likely also change over time as we age, or our life situation changes.”

 

YH: “These types of situations being made when things happen can fracture families, and create divides that are difficult to repair. Let’s normalize creating an end of life plan. Imagine the suffering that we can alleviate.”

 

EG: “Only 50% of people have a will. Get your will in order. This is especially important for a family where there is a person with a disability because any transfer of your estate to a person with a disability can drastically impact their social assistance benefits.”

 

 

Yvonne’s 7 takeaways to navigate through life, grief, and end of life

 

1. The Next Best Time is Now! The best time to talk about, plan and prepare for grief is when we are young and healthy. 

 

2. It Takes a Village to support: the ill, the caregiver, the dying, the bereaved and each other.

 

3. When someone is grieving, Just Show Up!

 

4. To be empowered, resilient and compassionate, Show Up For Yourself First!

 

5. Structure Your Life in such a way that you are self-reliant.

 

6. Find your Post, and hold onto it.

 

7. What will Your Legacy be?

 

To get the summary description of Yvonne’s 7 takeaways go to http://the7takeaways.ca/ to learn more, or you can listen to us discuss these 7 takeaways on the podcast by clicking below.

 

 

Tweet-able Moments from the conversation with Yvonne:

 

“Love & gratitude are the answer, no matter the question.” - Yvonne's mother, Waves of healing

 

“Our legacy is what we create in every moment of every day. It is how we make people feel.” -Yvonne Heath

 

“It [life] isn’t joy or sorrow, it Is is a rollercoaster, and when we take care of each other we can get through it [life] with greater joy.” -Yvonne Heath

  

If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit.

 

The Empowering Ability Podcast and Blog are made possible entirely by you, the support of listeners and readers. Thank you for considering a contribution to this work with a subscription!

 

 

Love & Respect,

Eric Goll

 

 

 

Resources:

 

Yvonne's Blog/ vlog

 

Yvonne Heath's 7 takeaways

 

Book: Love Your Life to Death

 

(Note: 25% of 'Love Your Life to Death' book sales purchased through this link go directly to Community Living Ontario)
 

 

 

Listen on the GO!

 

The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and all other major podcast apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!

#054: Ben Drew's Mission to Fight Oppression and Create Ordinary Lives for People with Intellectual or Developmental Disabilities

Learn about the Open Future Learning training resource for supporters of people that have an IDD, & how Ben Drew is fighting the oppression of people with IDDs.

 

In this podcast/ blog I had a pleasure of speaking with Ben Drew, Founder of Open Future Learning. Ben has over 20 years of experience working with people with an intellectual or developmental disability starting as learning disability nurse, then going on to create an individualized housing and support service, and he is now the Founder of Open Future Learning. Ben is also an incredible storyteller and even though this podcast is lengthy, it is a pleasure to listen to.

 

Due to the length of the podcast, the blog is broken down into Part 1, and Part 2. In Part 1 of the blog, you will learn about the Open Future Learning training resource for supporters of people with intellectual or developmental disabilities (IDDs), and Ben's life journey to fight oppression and create ordinary incredible lives for people with intellectual or developmental disabilities. In Part 2 of the blog, you will learn about 3 foundational support principals for exceptional support. As always, all of these insights can be heard by clicking play on the podcast player below.

 

 

You can listen to this conversation in its entirety by clicking play on the player below, OR by clicking one of the following links to listen on your favourite podcast player; iTunes, Spotify, and Google Play.

 

What is Open Future Learning?

 

Open Future Learning is an Online learning resource 100% dedicated to the field of intellectual or developmental disabilities (IDDs). The platform is developed for support staff, but anyone that touches the lives of people with IDD can benefit from the resource. The platform has a wide range of learning modules (for example: abuse prevention to social valued roles) which are delivered as interactive multimedia books. Open Future Learning is known for their short films and they have an on-demand video library with just over 700 short films featuring the leading global thinkers on IDD. They have also created a new product called Side-By-Side learning. 

 

Ben explains, “ We have the saying from self-advocates, ‘Nothing about us, without us’, but we don’t live up to this. Training is one of those things. So we developed ‘side-by’side’ learning. The person that receives the support and provides the support do the learning together. They are short 30-minute interactive learning modules."

 

Ben continues, "Much of the content is created in collaboration with many of the leading minds in the developmental disability community. It is a really financially efficient way to get people to access these leading minds, compared to only the select few that were able to go to a conference."

 

The platform is designed for support organizations and priced accordingly, however, if you are an individual learner or a family and you want access to this resource you can email Ben and he will help you to access this resource. Email hello@openfuturelearning.org

 

 

 

Ben Drew’s Mission To Fight Oppression and Create Ordinary Lives for People with IDDs:

 

Paraphrasing from the podcast, Ben shares his story:

 

“I grew up in the UK in a small town called Devon. On the outskirts of the town, there was a small community for people with IDDs. It was kind of like Camphill without the farm. My best friend from school lived in that community, his parents managed the community. He lived in this cluster of houses where people with IDDs lived. It was great because we played football (soccer) on demand, it was mostly guys, and I got to know all of these people in the best way. When these guys came into the town the way that other people interacted with them was different. They teased them, they spoke behind their backs about them. This always sat with me and it was the starting point to wanting to work with people with disabilities. Went I was 18 years old I went to a summer camp for people with IDDs in the US, and really enjoyed it. Then came back to the UK and got a job with a guy named Gary Kent. He lived in a large residential home with 20 people with IDDs. It was a hospital that had been converted for people with IDDs to live after the institutions closed. Gary lived there as well but decided he wanted his own home. He left and purchased his own home in a nearby village. When Gary came back to the residential home he said he had to close down the residential home. He had seen the other side of life. He was learning how to cook, he was in his own community, he had control over his life and his environment - and he wanted everyone else to have that.

 

There was a guy that lived there [in the residential home] that was physically abusive, and there was a guy that was a runner. When the runner chose where he wanted to live, he never ran away again. The guy who was a hitter moved into a home of his own and he stopped hitting people. You can be getting really good support and if the environment isn’t right and the location isn’t right - you can only so so much.”

 

Insight: This was a huge lesson for Ben when he saw the change in people when they got control of their lives. These oppressive environments occur in residential homes, but they can also happen within our family homes. Speaking from personal experience, my parents home became an oppressive environment for my sister Sarah (who has an IDD) due to a lack of choice, social isolation, and lack of transportation. Most of Sarah’s decisions were made for her and most things were done for her. Of course, these things were done with the best of intentions, but this caused more stress and anxiety on everyone in the household, everyone entering the household, and suppressed opportunities for Sarah to grow. Sarah has moved out of her parents home and into a home shared with me where she now has choice and control of her life.

 

Ben continues with a leadership insight:

 

“Vulnerability of leaders is important. Gary was always incredibly transparent. He would always share his mistakes and things he had messed up. The residential home was just another thing. In order to empower everyone else underneath him, he had to be that way. The people underneath him could also make mistakes, they could also mess-up. I see cultures in organizations coming down on people. If you make a mistake it is a warning, if you make 3 mistakes you aren’t allowed to do things anymore. That culture just doesn’t work.”

 

Ben then when on to set up service to help 100 people with IDDs over 6 years to buy or rent their own home, manage their own supports with their own budgets, in Bristol UK, using the formula Gary gave him. Ben then moved to New York, and that is where he started Open Future Learning.

 

Part 2 of this blog is coming on December 18th, with insights on 3 fundamental support principals that are foundational to great support. If you want to learn about these core support principals now, you can do so by listening to the podcast.

 

Ben is also the creator of memes that help to nudge people in the direction of being more accepting, more inclusive, and to develop the understanding of what it is like to live with an intellectual or developmental disability. Here are a couple of my favourites:

 

 

 

 

 

If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit.

 

You can also support this work by subscribing. This podcast and blog is supported completely by listeners and readers like you. Thank you to those that have supported by subscribing!

 

 

Love & Respect,

Eric Goll

 

 

 

 

Resources:

 

http://www.openfuturelearning.org/

 

https://www.youtube.com/user/OpenFutureLearning

 

Email: ben@openfuturelearning.org

 

 

 

If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes

 

 

 

The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!

 

Click Here To Listen on iTunes

#053: Personal Support Networks, with Rebecca Pauls

In this episode, you will learn all about Personal Support Networks! You might have heard of support circles, circles, microboards, or aroha's (there are probably names I'm missing), but theses are all forms of Personal Support Networks. Rebecca Pauls, Director of Planned Lifetime Advocacy Network (PLAN), shares with us with us what a Personal Support Network is, how they can benefit you, and how to go about building one.

 

Rebecca is the Director of Planned Lifetime Advocacy Network (PLAN), a Vancouver-based social enterprise that partners with families and people facing social isolation to secure their future by mobilizing relationships and leveraging community assets. Since joining PLAN three years ago, Rebecca has led a complete re-design of programming to integrate principles of person-centred planning, ABCD, narrative therapy, and independent facilitation. After demonstrating the strength and flexibility of this community approach, Rebecca is regularly invited to consult with organizations about how it can be scaled and applied to population groups across North America.

 

You can listen to this conversation in its entirety by clicking play on the player below, OR by clicking one of the following links to listen on your favourite podcast player; iTunes, Spotify, and Google Play.

 

How did PLAN Originate?

 

Rebecca shares:

 

“PLAN is an advocacy group in BC, which started with a group of parents that came together and founded PLAN 30 years ago. These parents believed their sons and daughters could contribute and be included in the community. The work of PLAN is charting a new path that is full of opportunity for people with disabilities. They are thinking about the present, but also the future. What happens when we are gone? This is when the idea of personal support networks really began to mobilize.”

 

One of PLAN’s ultimate aims is to create a Good life for families, which includes; Friends and relationships, making a contribution, being empowered to make choices, a place to call home, financial stability, parents have peace of mind. The basis of all of these things is to have people and relationships to do life together with. One of the main tools used at PLAN to accomplish this is personal support networks.

 

 

What is a Personal Support Network?

 

We all have a network – a group of people we depend on for companionship, support and decision making. This typically includes our family, friends, and neighbors, but also professionals like counselors or financial advisors. This group can be considered your “Personal Support Network”, and it reflects your personal interests, abilities, and needs. The specific individuals will vary by person and may change over time. Some networks will include many, while others just a few people. (Reference: PLAN website)  

 

What is the Purpose of a Personal Support Network?

 

Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:

 

To ensure that no one is alone or so no one is stuck in isolation. Sometimes we hear the saying that loneliness is the only debilitating disability. A personal support network is to ensure that everyone can live in an inclusive community. There are all sorts of things people in the network can do together and accomplish. At the heart of it is recognizing that we have the support that we need to live the life that we want and dream of for ourselves.

 

 

What are you seeing for people with Disabilities that have an intentional personal support network, vs those who do not?
 

Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:

 

“I think the difference comes in when the unpaid relational support is involved. When there isn’t a personal support network they might live a life where they don’t have friends. When a personal support network is involved and parents aren’t able to be involved, there are people that are there to play important and specific roles. At PLAN we have mentors to support families with building and maintaining these Personal Support Networks.

 

In different times in a person’s life, they might depend on a person’s personal support network in different ways. When they are a young person or things are going well they might do more fun and social things. At different points in life when challenging situations come up, or there is a need for planning and advocacy it might be more formal. You can often hear these networks being called natural supports, or circle of support, or microboard (which is the most formal way of setting up a personal support network). The most important thing is not what you call it, but in the way that people are working together. It is important not only for people with disabilities, but it is more like a way of being, and a way of living our lives. It is sometimes difficult to build or maintain those personal networks. PLAN has a community connector or mentors to help keep everyone connected.

 

How does someone build a personal support network?

 

Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:

 

“We start by getting to know who the person is, their gifts, what they think about, what they like to do, and the things that they care about. We build relationships based on common interests. When we build the network we focus on gifts and the uniqueness of each person. Then we think of who are all of the people in your life and build a relationship map. If there aren’t a lot of people in your life we think about if you did have people in your life, what roles would they play?

 

Then we look to the community. We believe that our communities are full of welcoming places and other people with gifts. When we look to build the connections we look for groups that are already in place. The role of the community connector is to create opportunities for the person to get connected.

 

Turning those relationships into a network is a matter of talking about what is important. We encourage people to share what is important in their life right now. The community connector can help to create the opportunities for people together.

 

As we reach a time where a generational shift is happening, the parents that created inclusion across the country are reaching their 70’s the rubber is hitting the road in terms of these networks and transition.

 

Building networks is a little bit counter-cultural, we are getting busier, and we are living more isolated lives, we don’t know our neighbors as much as we used to. ”

 

You can access the resources on building personal support networks (e-books and online courses) mentioned on the podcast in the resource section at the bottom of this blog).

 

 

 

Who plays the community connector role?

 

Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:

 

“Sometimes there is a natural connector in a person’s life. In other situations, the family might hire someone to play that role (Like the service PLAN offers). Some organizations train their personal support workers to take a network approach. The supporter will ask the question, who else can we involve?

 

Personal support networks usually come together every month or every other month to do some planning and to talk about what the priorities are for that month, and how they can support each other.”

 

 

What do personal support network meetings look like?

 

Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:

 

“Some are very structured and some are very natural. We plan based on what that person is comfortable with, what the current needs and priorities are. At PLAN every 6 months we create work plans. For the next 6 months, what do we want to accomplish? Do we plan events and celebrations, look for job opportunities, or find a new apartment. Each month the community connector will send a monthly update on the progress that is made.”

 

On the podcast, Rebecca gives examples of what support networks and roles people play in a support network can look like.

 

What are you currently learning at PLAN?

 

Paraphrasing from the podcast Rebecca Shares:

 

“PLAN has done a good job helping families build networks which have resulted in friendships and community contribution, but we are starting to really work toward helping people put those networks to work. Passing the baton from mom and dad to other people in the network, before we reach a crisis point and being proactive. Identifying the key roles, and what is the succession plan. Inviting network members and transferring the knowledge to the next generation. It is succession planning, what do we need to know and how do we start to pass this along. Roles like trustee, guardian or power of attorney, or more practical things like who is going to help this person go to the bank or transportation.”

 

PLAN has also developed a new planning tool that works to answer the question, do families have peace of mind? This is an interesting question because peace of mind is dynamic and it changes. This new planning tool helps families to understand if they have peace of mind in the different areas of life, and it helps families to think about what they need to do to get there. Listen to the podcast to learn more about this thinking that Rebecca shares.

 

A final message from Rebecca, “Personal support networks are about relationships. They are about living intentionally together and supporting each other and sharing what is important to us. For me personally, because of all of the changes we see happening in families and people sadly passing away, there is a real urgency for us to begin asking the question, ‘What does this {personal support networks] really look like?’, and, ‘Are we intentionally supporting each other?’. Do we know people that don’t have any relationships?, and asking ourselves, 'what we can do?'. There are all kinds of possibilities to connect and we just need to go after them."

 

 

If you received value from reading this blog or listening to this podcast episode I encourage you to share it with someone else you feel would benefit.

 

You can also support this work by subscribing. This podcast and blog is supported completely by listeners and readers like you. Thank you to those that have supported by subscribing!

 

 

Love & Respect,

Eric Goll

 

 

 

 

Resources:

 

Safe and secure, by Al Etmanski 

 

Online 6-week course called Personal Support Network Facilitation

 

Planinstitute.ca has several online resources in their learning center

 

 

 

If you received value from this content please leave me a review on iTunes. By leaving a 5 star review on iTunes you make the Empowering Ability Podcast more discoverable, and more families will benefit. Click Here To Leave a Review on iTunes

 

 

 

The Empowering Ability Podcast is available on iTunes and various other apps so that you can listen while on the go from your smartphone!

 

Click Here To Listen on iTunes